Ah, the local news is on!
A bizarre car accident in Whatcom county. A tree broke in a windstorm and crushed an SUV. The couple in the vehicle and their dog all died instantly. Detectives are checking whether the tree was rotting. Not sure what that's supposed to accomplish. _____ "Video from an avalanche" consists of shots of a helicopter taking off and some shots of a mountain in the distance. _____ Someone is throwing rocks at a couple's house. They just don't have any idea as to why. _____ More than 2000 swastikas on a Northwest elementary school. Police note that all the words were spelled correctly. This is an important clue. _____ Police in Hillsboro, Oregon found a starved toddler. He's in the hospital now and doing better. Meanwhile, in Florida, a girl was left for dead in a recycling bin under a pile of rocks. These items were not properly sorted at all! _____ A man sought for attempted rape (age 82) may be with relatives in the area. _____ Missing people in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. America's Most Wanted tips from last night have not panned out. _____ Kids died over the weekend in a fire in Ohio. There will be an investigation. _____ Less than 24 hours before the "legal showdown" begins in the Washington gubernatorial election. This is odd, because it seems to me the legal showdown has been going on for more than six months. _____ High gas prices are bothersome enough, but "bad gas" is "adding insult to injury." _____ Meanwhile, prices at the pump are inching down. _____ Don't drink the water east of Lacey--coliform bacteria! _____ No more free ride for Everett's Topper Motel on its code violations. It's being shut down. Residents will have to find other places to stay. _____ New fault line discovered right under downtown L.A. There's no telling when or if an earthquake will occur. I never knew this about earthquakes. _____ There will be a "Lahar Warning Siren" test tomorrow in Pierce County. When you hear the siren, get out your dictionary and look up "lahar." [COMMERCIAL BREAK]
A huge chunk of earth broke loose on Mercer Island "within a matter of seconds." The first clue was a subtle swooshing sound. A leaking irrigation system is blamed (by a random neighbor, citing no evidence). _____ Breaking news out of Iraq (at 11:15 p.m.). Someone was assassinated. I'm certain this just happened right during the commercial break or it would have run before the mystery-rock-throwing story. _____ Laura Bush in Jerusalem. Caught between rival protesters. Unfazed. _____ Alcohol affects women more quickly, researchers say. I thought this was a scientific truism. _____ Men are less healthy when their wives are successful, researchers say. _____ HeathWatch!: Cellulite! Cynosure, Inc. makes the cellulite laser. So-and-so doctor the HeathWatch! reporter is visiting has the only one in our state. It is "not a miracle treatment." Rats. (While you have your dictionary out for tomorrow's Lahar Warning Siren test, look up "cynosure.") _____ Plenty of sunshine coming up this week. Close-up shot of the moon--yes, it is clear now. _____ Revenge of the Sith has shattered box-office records! [COMMERCIAL BREAK]
[I note that it appears there will be neither a puff piece about some cast member of Desperate Housewives nor a puff piece about some cast member of Grey's Anatomy. Edward R. Murrow has slowed down to 33 rpm. Even more impressive, a character died on Desperate Housewives tonight, yet the actor was not interviewed about this development, how much he will miss the gang on the show, the great opportunity it was to work with Mark Cherry and the talented cast, etc.]
"A great day down at the Safe." In case we wondered whether that idiotic nickname was still kicking around somewhere. 5-0, Mariners. First winning home stand since July. First time they've won two straight at home this year. Yes, things are really looking up. _____ Some very short sports story that was over before I noticed it. Something about WSU football, perhaps? I just can't recall. _____ Spurs beat Suns in Game 1. _____ Some woman won a golf tournament in New York. Maybe it was a high school student or something; I think they said it was going to be back to school on Monday. It was not Michelle Wie. _____ Some horse did something good at Emerald Downs. _____ Play of the Night: Mets player goes into the stands to catch a ball. You'd have to pay me a lot to do stuff like that, but it's all in a day's work for a professional athlete. [COMMERCIAL BREAK]
A nice short painless goodnight. Must have run out of time because of all the massive amounts of news they had to report tonight.
Labels: television
posted at 11:30 PM
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