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DON’T

TRUST

SNAKES


“I know where I'm headed.”
ROGER THORNHILL



Thursday, May 25, 2006

But where does the incumbent stand on the critical issue of campaign-worker abuse?

I'm going to have to quote at some length from the "Mossback" ("News") column in the current Seattle Weekly, because it offers such a beautiful mix of disgruntled payback and unreflective narcissism. Or so it seems to me. The ostensible topic is whether voters should punish Senator Maria Cantwell for refusing to back away from her vote to authorize military action in Iraq.
"Cantwell is far from perfect. In fact, she ranks high among the most difficult people I've ever worked for or with. The seven months I spent in her charge felt like seven years. The campaign, larded with her RealNetworks stock windfall, spent more money on Red Vines than most candidates spend on direct mail. And conspicuous consumption during happy hour became all but a necessity, as it was invariably better to be half in the bag when Cantwell, a paranoid hellcat of a boss who rolls through staff like toilet paper, would make her daily sweep through the office, berating everyone in sight.

"On the trail, Cantwell often handled small groups of constituents in closed settings well. But she was not what you would call warm—a trait that should be preternatural for politicians of her stature. Her stump speeches were uninspiring and her grace with would-be donors flaccid at best. Most of the people who helped guide her to victory were motivated almost exclusively by their disdain for her opponent. Had a dead squirrel been the Democratic nominee for Senate that year, we would have busted our butts for the dead squirrel. Hell, we may have worked harder, because squirrels can't talk— especially dead ones.

"Essentially, we worked for Maria in spite of Maria. Yet if you were to ask Cantwell, the only person responsible for her victory over Gorton was the person who stared back at her in the bathroom mirror each morning. Her lack of gratitude and common human decency were simply repulsive. When the campaign ended, virtually nobody sought to accompany her to D.C. in even the cushiest of capacities. Good night and good luck, Senator, was the collective adieu.

"So there are plenty of good reasons for voters to withhold support from Cantwell, but her stance on the war isn't one of them. Despite the litany of character flaws, she remains a brilliant, driven public servant who rarely lets political expediency enter her sphere of consideration."
Got that? The "plenty of good reasons for voters to withhhold support from Cantwell," it seems, boil down to what a shit she was to the author (a/k/a "news columnist") and his fellow campaign workers. You know, I think she's apt to skate on those charges. (You don't hear much about candidates who were nice to their workers, do you? My guess is that most of them are enjoying life in the private sector.)

Something in all this reminds me of Malcolm McDowell's cameo in The Player: "Listen. The next time you want to badmouth me . . . have the courage to do it to my face." Not that many of us ever do.

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